Do you know what the hardest thing in life is? Going through life without a true family to keep you grounded. I have watched my husband go through a hard time recently when a family member died and it was hard for both of us. His family is on the opposite side of the country but we never hear until too late out about any major life changes. In my family, we are closer and yet I might as well live on the other side of the world. I used to talk to them constantly but I was never let in on the important things in our family either. To us, it is as if all our families are worlds away. To make things more complicated, we started talking about our future and realized that since we cannot have children, we will never start a family of our own. It will always just be the two of us.
Another sad note is that my family also thought my marriage would not last for many different reasons, yet we will be married for 8 years today. I think of all of this because I was planning something grand for our 10 year anniversary, but I came to the conclusion that it is pointless. It would be better money to take it and go away for a weekend.
Everything I have written here is true and was planned to be publish today, but things have changed. We have decided to push to move somewhere more permanent. I got a small part time job working 3 days a week and I am going to pay down our debts while also saving up. My goal is to have over $4,000 buy the end of 2018 and move in May of 2019. I will do whatever it takes to make this goal happen. I already have our debts and bills loaded up in a spread sheet with all plans laid out. We will either drive our few things cross country towards the west coast or use the money for a down payment on a house near us. Either way I want a real future, not one stuck in a rut. I think I will save up for that trip to be an amazing anniversary gift to ourselves. Enjoy your day everyone!
Ohio State Buckeyes Cufflinks, Money Clip and Tie Bar Gift Set: Show your love for the Ohio State University Buckeyes with this wonderful 3 piece gift set, featuring a pair of cufflinks, a money clip and a tie bar, all with the Ohio State logo on them. The money clip measures 2 1/2 inches long, 3/4 of an inch wide, the tie bar is 2 1/8 inches long, 1/2 of an inch wide, and the cufflinks measure 3/4″ x 3/4″. This is a bit high priced but you can reuse the items for all your special occasions.
Football Wedding Invitations: If you’re having a sports wedding, make your invitations fit your theme by including a ticket to your wedding! These can also be used as Save the Dates. The tickets will be printed on real ticket stock. They are perforated between the two sides making it look more authentic. Each ticket measures 2 1/8″ x 5 1/2″.
Playful Football Wedding Couple Figurine: If you and your beloved are Football fans, you’ll love this cake topper. Beautifully styled with exquisite detailing, this playful couple is destined to score a “touch down” on your big day. Hand painted porcelain. Presently the Bride and Groom Cake Toppers are available with skin tones and hair colors only as shown.
I am so tired that my thoughts just jump from one thing to the next. I want to write them out before they become lost in the whirlwind. I had a dream last night that I was back in high school and that cold winter day I over slept. My brother and sister were with me in a McDonald’s parking lot somewhere in Dublin. <Just note none of this never happened!> My sister was still an infant riding in her car seat in the back of my mom’s old tank of a car. I was discussing with my brother about the merits of just skipping school that day (I hate being out in the cold.. More reason to head home) At that moment the weather service on the radio said Dublin was under a weather emergency and then my sister started screaming. As I duck into the car to soothe her I notice the sky was beautiful. The Northern lights covered the whole sky. My sister told me she saw an explosion and pointed to where it was, only I realized it was not an explosion she was seeing but a funnel being formed. I yelled at my brother to start driving due to the closeness of the tornado only to almost run into another one backing up. These were not ordinary tornadoes… these ones froze things in their path. I am clutching my sister to my chest in the passenger seat as it grazes the car and I wake up. I woke up freezing and scared. I must have tossed and turned so much that the blankets came off of me. At that moment I was thankful to be in a warm building with no freezing tornadoes in sight.
Dreams can be the craziest things sometimes. Other times you relive moments in your life. I realized that my dreams have become so impacted by what I see on TV, that I need to adjust what I watch in those moments I am tired. Then I think of those dream that are just my fears shown to me, and I am thankful every moment those are just dreams. Dreams of losing loved ones, becoming injured or lost, and heartache. I challenged anyone who reads this to take a dream that scares you awake and find one thing that amazes you like I did with the Northern Lights. Maybe then our dreams will seem less dark to us the more we find the good in them.
This book is funny and takes a good look at the perception of sex between guys and girls. I can relate well to the author because I do not have a pressing need for sex all the time, but according to our society a woman in her 20s is a party girl and wants to have sex all the time. I think many of you would enjoy the book but most of you will chicken out of checking it out at the library for fear of how you will be viewed. Take a chance on this book, and you will not regret it!
From the book: “If I had a choice between having sex and reading a good book, the book wins. I notice I put in the adjective ‘good’—and that leaves me wondering if I’m not trying to put a better face on things. I still want people to read this and think, ‘Well, of course. If it’s a good book.’ But my boyfriend—the man I would eventually marry—would take even bad sex over a good book.”
Review: “The best part of this intelligent book is how Sewell subtly frames her sexual issues within modern culture, from Sex and the City to Girls Gone Wild to pornography and lap dances.” –USA Today
Do not let the title scare you off. It has a longer title, Pornology: Noun–1: A Good Girl’s Guide to Porn; 2: The misadventures of the world’s first anthropornologist; 3: A Hilarious Exploration of Men, Relationships, and Sex. I laughed a lot while reading this book. Ayn is a good girl who realizes she is in a not so good relationship, but when her boyfriend tells her she is pornophobic, she takes it as a challenge to see what porn really is. Along the way she finds the answers to many questions that good girls like me wonder about. A five star read for sure!! I was bored and picked this up just for the fun of it. This may answer those same questions many good girls wonder about. I hope you can enjoy this as much as I did.
Summary from Amazon: When Ayn Carrillo-Gailey confronted her boyfriend about his porn habit, he pronounced her “pornophobic.” Determined to prove she wasn’t phobic, simply more enlightened, Ayn set out to learn all she could about this phenomenon. Like any good researcher, she added her new quest to her daily To-Do list:
1. Drop off dry cleaning
2. Call Mom
3. Visit sex toy store on Melrose
Acting as an amateur anthropologist introduced Ayn to a world populated by everyday people. Her quest aroused the curiosity of her female friends: her knitting group quickly turned into informal information sessions, as the women—single or married, involved or not—were desperate for information. What does XXX mean vs. un-rated? What’s the difference between topless dancers and strip clubs? Why is some of it actually not that stimulating? And why are men obsessed with it?
Along the way, Ayn ditched the porn-obsessed boyfriend, and learned that one should not try to make change from a stripper’s G-string tips, nor is the Hustler store the best place to make a first impression on a hot guy. Pornology is the result of one woman’s quest to pierce the veil that modestly covers something many women actually want to know about. Suprising, hilarious, informative, and ultimately non-judgmental, this narrative is one readers won’t put down—once they admit they’re curious enough to pick it up!
To pick up a copy of this title, please click HERE.
I thought I was done writing. I am getting better and I have had less panic attacks. I was feeling less anxiety but then the depression started creeping in because part of my family would not let this go. They wanted me to remove this and let it hide in the darkness forever. In my heart is was just like when our roommate attacked me last year. Only this time my own mother is attacking me. She un-invites me to a family Christmas event and then lies to my baby siblings. Out of this, I have realized the more important things. Like my dad can talk about the funniest things when the dogs get going. My step mom is kinda cool and her Irish accent is amazing. My husband knows the right things to say. My husband’s family has not been able to be physically involved in our lives but have been there when we needed them. But with this post I am going to sign off with my real name. No more hiding.
I have also been working like crazy on the cooking blog! There are so many recipes that I want to try out and so many new items to test. I have let this blog fall a bit behind because I had no inspiration for more boards, but that is going to change! I will try to put one together at least once a month. I think I will focus on a local one first, so look forward to next month’s OSU theme! I miss doing these because they can be so much fun! If you have an idea that I would put into action feel free to comment it below.
And a thank you to all my readers and people just going in from Pintrest! You guys are the reason I keep this site going! I hope everyone has a safe Thanksgiving!
Family life can be complicated, but in my life it just means heartache. I am rewriting this post because my family found this blog and took offense to it. My mother even got sent a nasty text to my husband … Continue reading →